Mira Sorvino’s Stinky T-Shirt

Mira Sorvino's Stinky T-Shirt
On a superficial note, I am not a "gal pal," nor do I have "gal pals," and if I did, I'd be too busy throwing up to have much contact with them. Got this icky-toned e-mail last month, and I was a bit behind due to book-related stuff, so I'm only posting it now:

Subject: Re: Mira Sorvino Wants You To Tell a Gal P.A.L.

In a message dated 9/30/09 3:40:25 PM, Jamie.Dammrich@zenogroup.com writes:

Hi Amy,

As gal pals, we talk about everything. Yet there's one subject that often goes unsaid - domestic violence. Did you know that one in four women reports being abused by a husband or partner in her lifetime?

The Allstate Foundation and Mira Sorvino are encouraging people to talk for change about domestic violence through the Tell a Gal P.A.L.® campaign. Spread the word about domestic violence during October's National Domestic Violence Awareness Month by:

Listen to Mira's Story: Learn why spreading the word about domestic violence is so important to Mira. We encourage you to embed Mira's video on your site!

SHARE YOUR STORY OR 'TELL A FRIEND' AND ENTER TO RECEIVE A LIMITED EDITION T-SHIRT: Readers can share stories of overcoming domestic violence or helping a "gal pal" in need, or send a 'Tell a Friend' email. Readers who submit stories or 'Tell a Friend' can enter to receive a limited edition Tell a Gal P.A.L. t-shirt as worn by Mira Sorvino!

Ick. Do they wash it first, or is celebrity sweat supposed to be part of the charm? I mean, nothing against the girl, but the tone of this keeps making me want to make a dash for the porcelain bowl.

Jamie's e-mail continues:

DONATE A SUIT (Sep. 28-Oct. 9): Donate nearly new women's business suits to benefit survivors. Donated suits will be given to local domestic violence organizations and Dress for Success affiliates across the country. Click here to find a donation location near you. We hope you will take action and spread the word about domestic violence, inspiring other community members to do the same. If you're interested in speaking with someone from The Allstate Foundation, I'd be happy to coordinate an interview. Let me know if you have any questions and please visit ClickToEmpower.org for further information. A multimedia news release about Mira's partnership with the Allstate Foundation can be found here. Thanks, Jamie Dammrich On behalf of The Allstate Foundation 312.396.9715

I write to Jamie:

Where is this stat from, please?

And are you aware that men are also victims of domestic abuse, but they are more likely to try to laugh it off or leave it unreported?

Jamie writes back:

In a message dated 9/30/09 4:00:32 PM, Jamie.Dammrich@zenogroup.com writes:

Hi Amy,

That statistic is from the Extent, Nature, and Consequences of Intimate Partner Violence study by The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention and the National Institute of Justice, U.S. Department of Justice, July 2000.

Yes, we are aware that men sometimes are victims of domestic violence and may not report it. The facts and statistics that we have show that women are more often the victims of domestic violence. A 2005 study by the U.S. Department of Justice reports that women comprise 84 percent of spouse abuse victims and 86 percent of victims of abuse by a boyfriend or girlfriend. With the start of October's Domestic Violence Awareness Month we are focusing on the programs and tools that we can provide to help survivors of domestic violence lead safer, more secure lives.

Please let me know if you would like additional information.

Best,
Jamie

My turn:

From: AdviceAmy@aol.com Date: Wed, 30 Sep 2009 19:05:38 -0400 Subject: MORE - response - Re: Mira Sorvino Wants You To Tell a Gal P.A.L. To: Jamie.Dammrich@zenogroup.com

Thanks - but I think the stats are highly inaccurate due to a number of things -- often women are initiators and are put down as victims. Furthermore, as I pointed out, men don't report incidents and often are too embarrassed to identify even to themselves as domestic violence victims. For you to put out that 84/86 percent stat below is just wrong. The way I see it, the important thing isn't trying to impress people with wrong stats that sound impressive but to point out that domestic violence happens and what to do. And I happen to know, from my friend Sergeant Heather (of the LAPD, who works DV cases) that the one way to get victims out of these situations (men or women) is to get them to go to group sessions where other victims speak. Otherwise, they're defensive about their situation and about staying with their abuser.

DR. HELEN, who I forwarded my e-mail exchange to, does all the real heavy lifting:

Amy,

Thanks for setting the record straight. So great to see others that are fighting back. I really think there is a lot of money and power flowing to these DV groups and that is why they are so intent in keeping the false stats out there or using those that are outdated or onesided.

Here is a letter I sent to the Tennessee Department of Health with links to various studies that show women to be instigators of violence:

http://drhelen.blogspot.com/2007/11/my-efforts-at-educating-officialdom.html

Be sure to click Dr. Helen's link and read her letter.

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